Thursday, November 19, 2015
Each Day is as Hard as the One Before
They tell me one day all of this will get easier. We have filled our home with Heather's photos. Carol found this one yesterday. My girls are truly beautiful. Inside and out. I feel truly blessed to have the girls that I have. All of them have hearts of gold. I don't think there is anything they wouldn't do for someone else.
How hard it is to start each new day. Hard to put one foot in front of the other and face another day, knowing that Heather will never walk through the door with her beautiful smile and light up the room. The holidays are approaching and so many of our friends are trying to help us. I truly want to just stay in my cocoon and not go out. I know Heather wouldn't like that, but even before this, I became more and more of a hermit.
I see the anger and the hate in the world. It's awful. I see people struggling and fighting just to stay on top of things. It's a hard world. I see those in power stepping on the little people, just to make themselves better. Now and then, I see a light sneak through. A beautiful person crosses my path. That is what the world should be. Not what can you do for me, but what can I do for you?
People tell me to go to church, but even in church, I see judgments. As I said, I do better in my little world. I try to venture out now and then, but mostly, my excursions include taking a walk with Carter or Roxi. Sometimes I watch Carter playing with his friends and just watch and enjoy. Children truly are a gift.
Well, my day is about to start so I better go. You all have a great day. Know that we really are getting through this and we appreciate all the help. If I seem like I turn the help down, it's not anything against you. It's me. I do much better in the quiet than surrounded by people. Even still, I do want to thank you all for the help you have offered.