I Would Do Anything To Bring You Back
I will miss Heather for the rest of my life. My other daughters will miss her for the rest of their lives. We can't do anything to bring her back, but I am sharing my experiences and thoughts with all of you in the hopes that maybe, just maybe, someone else will find a reason to live. A reason to get the help you need to decide to stay in this world. Maybe you have lost your son or daughter by suicide, hopefully these posts will help you get through the pain you will encounter. This blog is my way of keeping Heather with me and I do this in her memory.
Heather told us in a note that she thought we may think she was selfish to choose death by suicide. She thought it would be more selfish of us to ask her to live in a world that she didn't want to be in. Look around. More and more people every day are choosing, like Heather, to no longer live in this world. Some are taking their lives by suicide, some are hiding in drugs and risking an overdose.
When we lost Heather was a very hard time for all of us. There were so many decisions to be made and I don't remember much of it. Myself and all my girls use social media and I knew, from hearing about others in the past, that rumors fly and mis-truths are passed around. I didn't want anyone whispering about her behind our backs. I shared what happened in a post on a blog and told everyone that we knew what happened.
One of the first things I was told was to write everything down because my memory wouldn't be working too well. I guess I took that literally because I renamed by blog and wrote down all my thoughts and feelings. While the posts got quite a few views, the one thing I heard consistently was that they were too painful to read. I can't argue with that at all. I have a hard time reading any of them.
At this point, about 2-1/2 years after she left us, I am going to start re-writing some of them and make more posts that will share the information, but maybe word them a little differently so people will be able to sit and read them all the way through. Besides helping others, I'm hoping this will be good therapy for me too.
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